I Fit in Nowhere

Mothers who are the primary or only financial provider for their family but also in a relationship fit in nowhere. I was recently lectured on a forum for giving advice to a single mom regarding finances. Even though I have been a single mom I am apparently unequipped to provide any advice on the topic because I am no longer. Funny thing about the lecturer, is she presumed to know way to much about me.

She has no idea that I am a former single mom. She also assumed that this husband staying home thing was my choice. It was not a choice it was something that just happened and here we are. I have to defend the fact that my husband stays at home with the kids and I work all.the.time. It gets old and I feel like I have no recourse. No one gets it.

I am complete agreement with equality between the genders. I like that one of the parents is home with our kids all the time. But my life is hard and I did not choose it. I will probably never be a stay at home mom but I cannot friggin wait to the day that my husband gets a job. That already puts me out of some groups.

I cannot talk to the single moms about it because I do have someone who stays at home with my children, which allows me to have the fantastic opportunity to work every single day, sometimes leaving the house for days at a time. With that being said, I am thankful for what my husband does to help me. I am not however, happy with being completely poor. I do not feel like I have any control of my life and I do not feel like I fit in with any particular subgroup. Of course, truth be told, I imagine my husband feels the same way. Not a lot of stay-at-home-dads, especially in the South.